Happier Beginnings
by Tatsumaki-sama
Summary: How Jim Kirk could have had a happy childhood.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Star Trek or any of its characters.

**Happier Beginnings**

George Kirk had never died.

The _Kevin_'s autopilot navigation wasn't destroyed and George Kirk was able to escape to the shuttles in a nick of time. He was there to assure his frantic wife that he was very much alive and he was there to hold his newborn son, James Tiberius Kirk, with a sense of joy and pride.

He was promptly declared a hero when he returned to Starfleet and named captain and given his own ship. Families of the survivors flocked over to his little farm in Iowa and endlessly thanked him. The media greedily swarm over him for weeks, itching for the story. A picture of him or his newborn son was worth thousands.

George simply told them the same thing. He did what he had to do and he happened to be there to make the right decision. One of the reporters called him modest. Others mentioned how any other hero would also "happened" to be there too.

After George realized how close he was to losing his wife and sons, he never missed an opportunity to tell him that he loved them. He watched his sons grow up, teaching them about life and love. He watched as Sam gazed lovingly at his bride, knowing that was the same way he looked when he married Winona. He watched whenever Jim came back with another perfect scored test or a heap of medals in hand, always ruffling his son's hair fondly.

Sam took after Winona, thoughtful and sensitive, with hazel eyes and quick hands. Jim grew up like him, blond, blue eyes, smart and reckless.

When Jim was named captain, George was sitting among the audience, grinning ear to ear, feeling nothing but pride. When Jim caught his eye amidst the crowd, George gave him the famous Kirk whistle and he knew from Jim's returning whistle, that his son heard him too. When reporters once again swarmed over him and his son, he simply said one thing to them.

" That's my boy," he said proudly.

**Don't we all wish**

Frank was a good man.

He rarely raised his voice towards the kids. And if he did, it was only because they had done something really, _really_ bad.

Jim took an immediate liking to the new man, giggling whenever Frank hoisted him up in the air. Sam was a little more reluctant, but eventually, he became close with his stepfather. Winona was able to lay her demons to rest and begin a new life.

When collectors and bargainers started eyeing George's beautiful, red Corvette, Frank was the one who told them to bug off. If they came back, Frank dealt with them and they would leave, grumbling and sighing that they couldn't get the now priceless antique. He knew how much that car meant to Winona and the boys. He couldn't imagine what life would be like if that car was sold off or broken into tiny little pieces by greedy merchants who didn't know the value of such a relic.

It was Frank who encouraged Jim to enter Starfleet, even when Winona wasn't too sure that her son should. She fiercely opposed of Jim going (she later confessed to Frank that she couldn't bear the thought if her youngest died like George). But Frank gently reminded her that there was no challenge or test worthy of Jim and by keeping him here, they would only be trapping him behind bars and barriers.

(By the morning, Jim knew what he did. He clasped Frank's shoulder before he left, with a knowing smile. Frank, in turn, reciprocated with one of his own.)

Over the years, Jim kept in touch with his family, especially Frank. He told them stories about Starfleet, his gruff roommate he christened Bones, all the pretty girls he has met, the stern teachers he endured and how he aced all his tests with minimal studying. He sent them pictures and Frank could see how happy Jim was there.

Then, the news about Vulcan and an unidentified spaceship came, buzzing around the news. Frank worried about his stepson, as senior level cadets would be called to the scene. Winona bit her nails nervously and he simply made more coffee to wait it out.

When the Enterprise finally touched down back home, Frank was the first one to break through the crowds and pulled his stepson into a warm embrace.

**That it happened differently?**

Upon hearing the death of his good friend George, Christopher Pike took it upon himself to take care of George's family.

Winona needed help to deal with the emotional devastation and the new weight of taking care of another child. Pike was there to give it to her. He was the one to gently take the baby Jim out of her frozen, shell-shocked arms after arriving back on Earth a week after the incident, so the doctors could look after her. He took the child outside, where Jim breathed the fresh air of Earth for the first and saw his first sunset, its golden, violet hues scattered across the skies.

Jim was no more than two, busy chewing on his favourite teddy bear's ear, when Winona dropped him off at Pike's place, needing to visit her sick father. He lifted Jim onto his lap and the boy stared back at him with those impossibly blue eyes, a reflection of his father's. For a split second, Pike could have sworn that it was George gazing right back at him.

But as much as they wanted, Jim was no substitute for George nor will he ever be. It was cruel and shameful of them to place such high standards on a child as young as Jim. There were times when he watched how Winona looked at Jim and knew how sometimes she didn't see the fair trade of losing her husband on that day.

So Pike decided to treat Jim as Jim, not the last reminder of his friend, not the hero of the Starfleet, not his father's son. Because Jim deserved to have a better life than chasing after his father's shadow. George Kirk didn't die to have his son live under his fame and heroics. And wherever George was, he hoped that he knew that his boy was being taken care of.

He watched Jim grow up, with a not quite normal childhood. His mother at times couldn't stand looking at him. The neighbours cast hurried glances at him. Classmates pointed and whispered. Teachers mostly left him alone. Occasional strangers walked up to him and shook his hands gratefully before leaving without another word. He felt alone, isolated and not really knowing why.

But he trusted Pike out of everyone that he knew, including his mother. Pike alone wasn't someone who would give him the pitying gaze or the admiring stare. Pike did what he could, treating the boy decent and normal. And he knew how happy Jim was whenever he dropped by for a visit and told him stories about space and the adventures beyond the stars.

Jim had the effect of rubbing off on him. He was bright and smart, always curious and eager to learn. And the respect were not all unrequited.

Pike had found him wiping blood off his face on the ground after a bar fight, grinning wildly and declaring that he would join Starfleet. " You're insane, you know that?" Pike gruffly muttered, helping him stagger up to his feet.

Jim smiled in all his glory. " You worry too much,_ Dad_," he casually said, clapping a hand to Pike's shoulder. His tone was mocking, but his eyes gleamed of respect and affection.

He would never admit it out loud, but Pike was near bursting with pride when Jim called him that.

**That something would changed?**

Winona Kirk died after one year of her husband's death.

Some people suspected that she pined for him and simply lost the will to live. Others brutally whispered of suicide. Winona's mother knew better (it was cancer that rid her daughter of any warmth left in her blood) and snapped at anyone who mentioned it.

She and her husband raised the child Jim and his brother Sam in their little farm of Iowa. They cared for the two of them like they were their own.

Both children had their difficulties at first. Sam was brooding and hurt, now suffering the loss of both his parents. Jim was confused and angry that neither of his parents cared long enough to live for him. Their grandparents taught them love and forgiveness and they slowly learned to let go of the blame and anger directed at their parents.

But no matter their grandparents loved them, they were not Sam and Jim's parents nor will they ever be. They could be as close as they want to and they could pretend that they are. Still the fact remained that they were getting older and could not care for two boys as well anymore. Things changed when Jim's grandfather died.

Sam got married and moved away to some other state. Jim remained, looking after the farm on his own. His grandmother felt guilty that she was the one who held Jim back from his dreams and she kept telling him he was free to leave. But Jim didn't budge and deep inside, she selfishly wished he would stay.

When she got dementia, Jim was forced to bring her to a retirement home. He could not juggle the farm, school and looking after his ill grandmother all at once. He visited her often, bringing her flowers and a kiss on her thin cheek, in hopes that she would remember him. She merely blinked dully at him and said nothing.

At age twenty-two, Jim finally left home. He came to her room as usual, with the flowers and the same kiss on her cheek. He told her that he was going to Starfleet and he won't be coming back for some time. He promised to visit whenever he could and he was holding her frail hands so gently. She was too busy staring out the window, humming snatches of an old tune, to recognize his words or to notice that he kissed her cheek one more time before he left.

Three years later, on a sunny morning, the nurse wheeled her out to the dining hall. She was busy playing with a loose strand of hair to realize that it was not yet lunchtime. The nurse stopped in front of a moving screen and she pointed at the screen, saying something about a hero, a ship and an adventure of a lifetime. The old woman tilted her head as she watched the moving pictures and a handsome boy stepped out.

Something jolted in her memory and she reached out to touch the screen, smiling absently to herself.

**It would have been nice  
**

Starfleet had several experiences in dealing with orphans of deceased parents who had served in its service.

They did their best to honour the parents' last request, whether the child or children should be sent to live with relatives or family friends. Unfortunately, in James Kirk's case, neither his father or mother lived long enough to tell them and a quick search in the database showed that James Kirk had one aunt living on Tarsus. So they sent him there.

His aunt cherished her nephew and brought him up along with her own son. His uncle found himself liking Jim's sharp wit and taught the boy a few things about fishing. His cousin couldn't be anymore happier to have another brother. Jim loved his aunt, uncle and cousin dearly and never doubted it, even when they finally told them that they weren't his real parents.

Tarsus was a good place to live, with plenty of food and fields for crops and children to run and play in. Kodos ruled the colony well and they flourished under his rule.

Jim was accepted into Starfleet when he was sixteen, a genius and a child prodigy, they called him. By twenty, he was a captain of his own ship and the youngest captain ever recorded. Starfleet thrived and prospered with him in their ranks. He made peace with colonies and new planets, bringing them into the Federation and even managed to treaty with the Klingtons and Romulans peacefully.

With the legend of his parents behind him, Jim was a hero by his own right. Starfleet named him Admiral not too long afterwards. All the cadets wanted to be like him. All the officers desired to serve under him. Even the people of distant planets knew the name of James Kirk and revered in his greatness and sent many requests to Starfleet to meet with him.

His family supported him one hundred percent, delighted to see that Jim was following after his father and mother. But he told them that they were the ones who got him into Starfleet. They had saved him when he was only a baby and he wanted to return the favour back to them.

" You _are_ my mother and father," he declared. " And nothing will change it."

**That a single thing  
**

If Jim didn't have an aunt on Tarsus, Starfleet would have gone through the process of adoption and foster families.

They sent him to Iowa, close to the hometown of his parents, out of sentiments. A nice couple with two children of their own took him in and raised him up. Jim Thristle grew up, not knowing about his parents, not knowing about how his father was a hero, not knowing how his mother lived long enough to give him her blessings.

He followed in the steps of his foster father, becoming a computer technician. He was a good kid, never drinking or picking fights with the local boys or flirting shamelessly with every girl he laid eyes on. He settled in Iowa, found a wife, got married and had a few kids.

Jim was helping the family down the road reboot their computer when he had heard the news about the desctruction of Vulcan and the several thousands of deaths of cadets and officers of Starfleet.

He winced at the loss, but went home without a second thought to it.

**Could change history  
**

But that fact was that George Kirk was dead. Winona was too lost in her fantasies and the past. Frank was a lousy stepfather who hated children. Chris Pike never knew about Jim until later on. Jim's grandparents were long gone before Jim was born. Tarsus had taken away Jim's family. And there were no foster parents to care for one lost little boy.

Jim Kirk grew up with no one to love him and with no one to love back.

" I'm so screwed up," he choked out in his feverish delirium.

He didn't realize his crew had heard his rabid mutterings and the what-haves and the could-have-beens. McCoy, with unusual gentleness, pushed the last hypospray into Jim's neck. " You're not screwed up, Jim," he said softly. " Far from it."

He blinked owlishly at them, slowly processing the information. There was McCoy, who was the closest thing he had to a father and favourite uncle. His First Officer Spock became his friend and eventually a strict verison of an older brother. Scotty was the lighter version of his older sibling and one he could talk to after a long day over some drinks. Uhura was his mother, able to see through his lies and broken fascade and mend him up afterwards. Calm Sulu and intelligent Chekov were the two younger brothers he wanted to keep forever with him. The rest of the crew could be called his children, with the way he fiercely protected them and watched over them, like a father wolf would.

" Really?" he asked in a child-like voice, eyes slowing drifting shut.

" Indeed, Captain," Spock assured him.

" So you'll all be here when I wake up?" he mumbled sleepily.

" Of course, laddy," Scotty gripped his hand comfortingly.

" We promise," Chekov piped up at his side.

" We'll be here," Sulu confirmed on his other side.

" Good to have you back, sir." Uhura's lips twitched in relief.

The last thing Jim saw before his eyes slid shut was his family smiling at him.

He was home.


End file.
